Relationships – we all talk about them. Relationships with our family, friends, boyfriend, girlfriend, professors, classmates… They are essential for our existence because a human being wasn’t born to live alone.
Since the day we are born we seek human touch, presence and the sense of security that comes with the notion that someone is around but what happens when that just isn’t enough? What happens when relationships become a burden and our mind spirals out of control? How do we form that sense of security that comes with the notion that someone is around if all we want to do is be alone?
Sometimes we get so caught up in all of our relationships that we forget to keep our eyes wide open and remember why we are doing everything we do. Relationships make distractions become our daily routine and then out of the blue our life comes knocking at the door and we’re so scared to open because we become aware of the mistakes we can’t fix.
Right in that moment when we realize nothing is going our way and that we can’t fix it starts the phase of finger-pointing. Everyone is to blame for our failures. We are victims of circumstances. We didn’t bring this on ourselves. It’s their fault, everything is their fault!
We start to blame everyone around us for every bad thing that happens because admitting that we didn’t take control of our life in time is one more burden our backs can’t carry. It’s easier to look at yourself as a little victim than it is to blame yourself for your problems.
In the stage of finger-pointing we normally push people away because we constantly see them as the cause of our misery. Right in that moment our mind is a blur, our eyes don’t see clearly. Right in that moment you need to snap out of it!
Stop blaming everyone and admit it was you. You did this and that. You didn’t take care of yourself. Forgive yourself and give yourself some time to go over everything you did wrong. Don’t push people away, just take time away from them. Take some time to work on your most important relationship and that is the one you have with yourself. You are the alpha and the omega of your life and only you can save yourself.
Work on improving yourself as a person and just take some time to learn how to build that sense of security on your own. Learn how to handle yourself and most importantly learn how to forgive and respect yourself. Make sure you can count on yourself when everything goes down.
Don’t expect you’ll be able to have healthy relationships with other people if you are not one complete person and if you don’t have a healthy relationship with yourself.